What does facebook do for you?

Yes, another facebook post. And you thought everything that had to said about facebook was said and done, right? So I ignored the bit about the Italian mafia fan group on facebook – okay, so I did not ignore it completely, I linked to it and moved on. I even refrained from saying anything about the latest on facebook on the she-who-shall-not-be-named TV anchor who has been more in the news than on it these last few days.

Till I read this today – Friends, Until I Delete You. So facebook which reports every single embarrassing detail of your life on the home page with a little red flag, stays silent when you drop a friend from the list. So far so good.

And then this comes along – It is this policy that Burger King ran afoul of this month with its “Whopper Sacrifice” campaign, which offered a free hamburger to anyone who severed the sacred bonds with 10 of the friends they had accumulated on Facebook. Facebook suspended the program because Burger King was sending notifications to the castoffs letting them know they’d been dropped for a sandwich (or, more accurately, a tenth of a sandwich).

Now would I drop ten ‘friends’ from my facebook list for a burger? In a jiffy! In fact, I would do it for nothing, perhaps have done it (and if you are reading this and have added me in the past on facebook, don’t go running there to check – I still love you). Really, what is this with complete strangers adding me to their friends list, I sometimes fume. But then, that is the point of networking – strangers become friends in an instant, intimate enough to start throwing sheep and cakes at and sending little bits of green earth to boot. That said, I am the types to stare suspiciously at anyone who speaks politely to me, so I guess I am really not suited for facebook networking.

Really, what is the point, I have often wondered. Especially if I am wary of adding people I do not know, and have a friends list on facebook which more or less is a combination of friends and acquaintances from my real world. And I hate it when people I have spent years running away from, find me on facebook and demand to be included in my world in a very public manner. The thing is, facebook keeps the people active in my mind – every one of my friends on facebook is in my peripheral vision the minute I log in. I know who is changing jobs, who is having a baby and who is on vacation where. And that is perhaps the single most important function of facebook. It keeps me informed.

I know that I can reach out to any of them when there is a need. I could email, sure. Or call or reach them in many other ways, but there is a such a complete lack of formality in leaving a message on facebook that no other channel can give me. Staying in touch, or picking up threads just does not get breezier than this.

Added to that the joy of fulfilling my hidden voyeuristic tendencies – why else would I click links that show what my friend had written on someone else’s (who I do not know?) wall or has been tagged in photographs of a birthday orgy in another country? It keeps me informed, and more importantly, entertained.

The voyeurism bit? That brings me neatly to the other reason I started writing this post, this report I read a few days ago – Man kills wife over Facebook update to ‘single’ – According to prosecutors, her husband, Edward, saw her Facebook relationship update and rushed to her parents’ home in Brown Lees, United Kingdom, where she was staying. He smashed the front-door window, forced his way into the house, and stabbed his wife to death. He then tried to stab himself to death and somehow failed.

Date : January 23, 2009. People : Edward and Sarah Richardson.

Wait, there is more. I had lost the bookmark to this bit of news and googled for it, and I found this – Man killed wife in Facebook row – Wayne Forrester, 34, told police he was devastated that his wife Emma, also 34, had changed her online profile to “single” days after he had moved out. The Old Bailey heard Forrester drove to her home in Croydon, south London, and attacked the mother-of-two. He stabbed her with a kitchen knife and a meat cleaver on 18 February.

Date : October 17, 2008. People : Wayne and Emma Forrester.

What kind of world are we living in? And who is to blame for this? If there is such a thing as too much personal information, then it is on sites like facebook that we tend to slip – the best of us. My boss, for instance is on my facebook list – and it is not always a nice thing for the boss to know where I was last weekend. Or even my current state of mind. Heck, those of you who quail at the thought of you mother reading your blog, wait till your boss asks you about your facebook status. Or your friend to whom you have lied about being sick and sorry, I will not be able to attend your son’s second birthday party, finds your photographs from that evening, beer mug in hand and plastered look on face surrounded by people, the next day.

It is not always possible to juggle with the information you want to put out, filtering it through each contact on your list and judging how they would react to it. Or is it?

Is it not just possible, but also critical?